


This Freedom I Like It

by castielcampbell



Category: MCU, Marvel
Genre: Depression, F/M, Fluff, Marvel - Freeform, Whump!Clint, clint dealing with his feels, he needs a hug and wanda is there to gives it, mcu - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-23
Updated: 2015-03-23
Packaged: 2018-03-19 04:34:28
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,753
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3596547
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/castielcampbell/pseuds/castielcampbell
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Clint walked into an elevator and tried to walk out when he saw Wanda, but the door closes. He has a small panic attack, because she's a magic user, and his last run in with a magic user didn't end so well.</p><p>Wanda helps him through the panic attack and much whump is to be had :3</p>
            </blockquote>





	This Freedom I Like It

Clint walked into the elevator and almost immediately stepped right back out, but the doors closed.

‘Just breathe Barton, she’s one of us now. Just breathe. She’s not Loki. She’s from Earth. She’s nice.’ He chanted inside is head as he stabbed the first floor button and backed himself into the corner of the elevator. Nervously his hand slid down his face, his heart was racing. His mantra was not working even remotely.

Wanda looked around, curious as to the source of the archers distress, but she saw nothing.

Just as she was about to speak the elevator gave great jerk, the lights flickered, and they came to a sudden and abrupt halt.

“Uh… No… No.. No. JARVIS!”

 _“Right here Master Barton.”_ Came the eery omniscient voice that powered the building and intrigued both Wanda and Pietro to no end.

“Hey, what’s going on? The elevator just… stopped.”

“ _I am aware. There seems to be some technical difficulty. Patching Sir in via video now.”_

 _“Hey- J…wha… Oh, hey, Legs. What’s goin—- Barton are you okay?”_ Tony stumbled over his words as soon as he noticed the paleness of Clints face.

“No, at the moment, I’m NOT okay. We’re stuck in the elevator, between the 102 and 103 floors.” Clint gulped for air, he was well on his way to a full blown panic attack and that annoyed him. 

“ _We?”_ Tony asked raising an eyebrow.

Wanda leaned in a little and waved awkwardly before resuming her stance against the far wall.

“ _Oh, hey Wanda…”_ His eyes grew wide after it clicked. “ _Oh shit, Wanda… I mean… Hey… Wanda, could you do me a massive favor?”_

“Yes Mr. Stark.”

Tony winced. “ _First of all, we’ve talked about the Mr. Stark thing. Only Pepper calls me that, for … reasons. And it’s super awkward when I hear friends call me Mister. It’s either Tony or Stark, please.”_

“My apologies, I forget.”

 _“No worries. I’m sure it just takes some getting used to. Second of all, I need you to do me a teeny tiny little favor and NOT use any magic.”_ Tony glanced at Clint. “ _Just until I have you guys unjammed okay?”_ Tony winced inwardly when he saw Clint plastered against the back wall, his face covered in a sheen of sweat, nodding imperceptibly.

“No problem.”

 _“Good, good. Thank you.”_ Tony wiped his hand over his face anxiously when he saw Clint mouth ‘thank you’ as well. “ _Okay, so I’m going to sign off now. Just sit back, relax, and don’t have a heart attack.”_

“Wait wait… Tony, I could.. I could open the doors or… go through the roof…”

Tony winced.  _“No dice, Merida. The elevators are so wired with tech that a) it would fry you and b) if it didn’t fry you, you’d wish it had when Pep gets done with you.”_

 _“_ Right… right.. sorry.”

 _“It’s okay, just stay calm, and I’ll have you out in about 10-15 minutes.”_ Tony turned around in his  _“JARV! Allocate all of your non-menial task run time to helping me fix-”_ the screen winked out and Clint slowly slid to the floor.

‘She’s not like him. She doesn’t even carry a staff. She’s not hell bent on world domination. You recruited her for pities sake. She doesn’t want to hurt you. She doesn’t want to control you. She’s a good guy.’ He didn’t that realize A) he had sunk to the ground or B) that he was so thirsty until Wanda was putting her freshly opened cold bottle of water in his hand as she made herself comfortable on the floor.

“Here, drink, it’ll be over soon.” She offered softly, as she settled against the wall.

“Thank you,” he managed as he lifted the bottle to his lips and drank in deeply. ‘Look at that. She’s helping you out and still you’re freaking out over this.’ He berated himself.

“Sooo, it is…. elevators? Small spaces? Getting stuck in elevators …. or…”

‘She’s gonna think you are one of those anti-mutant assholes. You are NOT an anti-mutant asshole.’ He berated himself.

He wanted to make himself smaller, sink into the wall, become invisible, a smaller tar—- “No… No.. No… Stop..Stop IT! Stop. Adding. Layers. To. The. Nightmares.” He emphasized each word by hitting his head on the wall of the elevator.

He glanced over at her and she was avoiding looking in his direction.

“Here’s the thing.” He started off softly. “I had a crappy childhood. I’m not playing a game of who had the shittiest childhood, I’m just stating facts. My father was a drunk that got his jollies beating the shit out of me and my older brother. Hell, half the time he wasn’t eve drunk. Our mother didn’t give a shit, as long as he didn’t hit her. Hell, she’d help him find us if we were feeling clever, and hold us down when we started to get smart.”

He gulped down more water, knowing if he stopped he’d never finish.

“It was bad. Just sucked. Then they died, car accident, drunk driving, old man finally did it. Killed em both. My brother and I were sent off to an orphanage. We were afraid of being separated.” He laughed humorlessly. “No, I take that back. In hindsight, I was afraid of being separated from him, he was afraid he’d lose a flunky in his compulsively clingy baby brother. So, like idiots, we ran.” He laughed harshly again. 

“Long story short, we spent a couple of rough years on the streets, ended up, in… of all places, a circus. We did piddly shit until they discovered that I had a knack for archery. ‘The Amazing Hawkeye’ they called me. ‘Never misses a shot’ they said. What they meant to say was ‘Runaway Orphan, Never Misses a Shot Unless He Wants The Crap Beaten Out of Him’ or shoved in a small cage, or … or…” he took a large gulp of water to keep the bile down. This girl had seen enough of the world, too much to know everything else. 

“Eventually I got betrayed, beaten, left for dead. I left, but I ended up going back; got betrayed again, and this time my brother left me for dead. That’s always a nice twist.” He snorted derisively.

“This time I got picked up by some shady shady men who made me do some shady shady things, because I owed them a life debt.” He shook his head. “I was there for so long that I actually started believing it.” He drank deeply, needing to get it all of it out. 

“But then I broke off.. it’s hysterical really. Best and worst decision of my life.”

“How?”

“Best cause it got me out of there. Worst because then my name was on the top of every merc and up and coming mobster, gang banger and just all around shifty peoples ‘TO KILL’ list.” He chuckled. “It got bad. I mean real bad. I was able to take some small stuff, stuff I wanted to do. Take out some bad people, but there was always a chance that it would be a double cross. I was so fucking paranoid. By the time S.H.I.E.L.D. found me… I reckon I had about a month to live. Wasn’t eating. Couldn’t sleep. Living off caffeine pills and coffee; by the way, don’t do that; evar.”

“I will take that under advisement.”

“Good. S.H.I.E.L.D. found me, helped me out, I got a handler that didn’t want to kill me, I eventually found Natasha; she’ll have to tell you that tale. I won’t, she’ll kill me.” He shrugged helplessly.

“It was good, for a couple of years. Really good.” His face turned dark suddenly. “It only took a month for everything to go to hell in a handbasket. First Thor showed up, he’s not such a bad guy once you start understanding what he means and not just what he says. But then his brother showed up.” His voice dropped low. “Real big tall guy, dark hair, had a penchant for the color green and dramatics. And he had a staff. He used magic.” His voice trembled and he couldn’t look at her.

“Oh.” She whispered.

“He said ‘You have heart’ and touched the staff to my chest, and that was it. Lights out. I was stuck inside my own head screaming, raging, begging, pleading—” his voice hitched. “The last thing I did that I could control was when he told me to shoot Maria Hill and Nick Fury. I pulled the gun at the last minute, got them both but not kill shots. And that was it. The lights went out. He took me to this lair that he found in my memories, that I don’t even remember, he put a phone in front of me and told me to call all the mercs I knew. I think I managed to keep myself from calling all of them. Wade didn’t show up, and Wade always shows up when I call.” He shook his head miserably. “He sat me down and made me tell him everything I knew about S.H.I.E.L.D. it’s agents, the handlers, the director, the helicarriers, my partner… everything.” Tears started to run down his cheeks.

“Seventeen people died because of what I told him. Sixteen agents, and my handler.”

He shook his head sharply, trying to regain his composure. “So, it’s not  _you_ that makes me uncomfortable. I don’t hate you. It’s just… “

“ _Magic.”_ She scooted over to him, situated herself closer to him, reached out, took his face into her hands and wiped away his tears.

“It is only logical to have some level of apprehension of magic after such an experience.” 

——-

Behind her the television flicked on, Tony was about to spout off some witty rejoinder when he saw how they were sitting. He did a double take and the screen went black.

“JARVIS! Is that consensual? Do I need my suit?”

“ _No sir, from what I have gleaned Master Barton was merely explaining his discomfort with her skills and how it does not reflect upon her as a person.”_

“Oh, well as long as their okay. Ummm. Hey, make sure to tell Pietro that she’s … not in danger.”

“ _Of course sir.”_

 ——-

Clint sighed heavily, closing his eyes, leaning into her touch. “Yeah, and it adds to the nightmare material.” He whispered softly. 

“And that was what you were saying?”

“Yeah, I already see myself killing my CO. I see myself killing Nat. And then I started trying to make myself smaller, less of a target—”

“Making new layer of nightmares.” She whispered, rubbing his temples as he nodded.

“Look, I can’t make promises for other people that use magic, but I promise you, I will never use my gift on you.”

“You don’t have to-”

“No, but I want to. I want you feel safe in your own home. I don’t want you to avoid me or Pietro. We owe you a great debt, for your kindness. We will protect you, Clint. I promise.”

She moved to hug him and he felt a great coil of tension release from his stomach. As she held him he cried for what felt like the first time in ages.

——

Natasha came around the corner into the main common room but slowed when she saw that Tony was watching the monitors.

“What’s up? One of the camera’s on the fritz?”

Tony jumped slightly, looking at the camera in question. “Ah, no, actually, I’m being respectful.”

Natasha arched an eyebrow. “Do I even want to know?”

_“Pardon the intrusion sir, but I believe now would be an opportune time to start the elevator. I believe the ‘moment’ as it were, has ended.”_

“What moment? What’s he talking about?”

Tony looked pained. “Has… Barton ever talked to you about… you know… Loki, the Helicarrier… Coulson?”

“No, he refuses. He broods and has nightmares and refuses any help. Look, I know he needs to talk to someone but—”

“He has…or he was, I think. Jarv, did he talk about it?”

“ _Briefly sir, but I believe it has lifted a great weight of Master Bartons shoulders. Commencing livefeed.”_  Natasha stepped out of camera right as the screen came back up.

——

As they embraced the elevator gave a great shake and the monitor came back on. They rose to their feet, but Clint didn’t want Tony to see his face.

Tony was smiling. “ _And we’re back. Sorry about that. You know how it is, snafu’s and what not. Good news though, everything is back online!”_

“Yes, thank you M… Stark.”

Tony’s smile grew . _“Getting better at it I see. Well, I’m going to let you lot go. Is there anything else you need?”_

"Ummm, yes, I think Clint wants to go back to his floor, yes?” Clint nodded into her neck.

“Yes, Clints floor please.”

 _“Rerouting Elevator, sir.”_ Jarvis’s voice said calmly and the elevator started back up as the screen went blank and retracted into the wall panel.

_——-_

Tony turned to Natasha. “He’s going back to his —-”

“And so am I.” She said, her voice thick with emotion. She hadn’t seen Clint that emotional since the funerals. She wasn’t going to abandon her partner when he needed her the most.

“Jarv, tell Pietro what’s going on before he scales the side of the building… again.”

“ _Of course, sir.”_

——-

“ _Master Maximoff, your sisters elevator ran into some difficulty. She is on her way to the 114th floor, you may want to be there.”_

“Thanks.” He said before taking off like a shot up the stairs.

——

Right before the elevator door opened there was a wooosh of air. “Pietro.” Natasha greeted.

“Ms. Romanova.” He said in kind.

——

As the elevator climbed they broke their embrace. “I am such a mess right now.” Clint quipped as he dried is eyes.

“Here, use this.” She handed his some tissues. 

“Oh thank god. I’m getting kind of gross.” They both chuckled at that.

“What now?” She asked softly as he blew his nose.

“I don’t even know. I’m so tired. I haven’t slept in… ages. Just so run down. I could fall asleep right here.” He muttered resting is head against the wall.

“ _Floor 114.”_ Jarvis chimed.

“No sleeping in the elevator. It would make for bad press, yah?”

“Yeah, yeah, just so tired.”

She put herself under his arm and let him lean against her. “Then I will put you to bed and watch over you.”

He smiled his eyes half lidded. “I… I could go for that.”

The door opened and there stood Natasha and Pietro. 

“Tash…”

“You stupid, stupid American man.” Natasha whispered as she embraced him, kissing his cheek and holding him close. “I’m always here for you. Always, you get that?” 

“Yeah, I just guess I need reminded.”

“Then I’m going to remind you.” She held up a key in front of Pietro’s face. “It’s to Barton’s suite of rooms. You wann…” he took the key and ran off. “Eager boy, that one.”

They chuckled as they made their way down the hall. “Are you going to sleep now, Clint?” Natasha asked softly. “No more roaming the halls or standing on the Avengers deck brooding at the moon.”

“S’not brooding. S’contemplation.”

“In Russia we call that brooding.”

Wanda agreed.

“God I’m surrounded by Russians. It’s too late, they’ve already taken over.” He moaned goodnaturedly, and the girls smiled in return. 

When they got to his room and got him into bed Wanda stayed beside him, holding his hand. Natasha came back into the room in her black silk pajama pants and top.

“You comin’ to bed too?” He asked blearily.

“Yes, I’m going to assassinate your nightmares. Your nightmares will have nightmares about me. Scooch over, you know i like the side by the window.”

He did and she tucked herself in against him, but on top of the blankets, one hand over his heart, the other carding through his hair.

Clint sleepily turned to Wanda. “You don’t have to stay.”

“I promised. So I am staying.”

He smiled weakly.”Thanks.” And his next breath was soft and even. 

Pietro rearranged the chairs quietly so that she could rest her head in his lap and still hold Clints hand.

Her own eyes started to slide closed as he carded his fingers through her hair. “This freedom Wanda. I like it.”

“Me too.” She whispered softly, before dozing off to sleep.


End file.
